My story is about birth trauma and began in early 2022 when I gave birth to my son, and what was supposed to be a magical day ended up being traumatic. I did not know what to expect with my first pregnancy or birth. However, my expectations were similar to what we see on the movie screens.

Whilst the thought of going into labour scared me, it was also all so new and exciting, as I knew I was about to meet the little human my husband and I created. Unfortunately, I quickly learned that not everyone has a perfect birth.

At 41 weeks, I was advised by medical professionals that I should be induced, to which I agreed. I was in labour for approximately four hours, and out of nowhere, I was told I needed to have a caesarean section as I was not progressing. I was not mentally prepared for this.

I am bad with needles; therefore, the thought of having a major surgery whilst being awake petrified me. I remember laying on the theatre table, uncontrollably shaking and wondering why this was happening.

The moment they held my baby up over the blue sheet, I just wanted to hold him. All I could hear was his little cries, and I was screaming at the top of my lungs to hold my baby. Five minutes later, I was given him, cleaned, and wrapped. There was no direct skin-on-skin contact, which, to this day, breaks my heart.

Whilst the hospital may have been just following their policies, the entire experience resulted in me having birth trauma. For the first 16 weeks of my son's life, I was a blubbering mess and had no idea what was happening to me. I adored my baby boy, but I could not help but feel like my whole birthing experience had been ripped away from me. I was grieving my birth.

It took numerous counselling sessions and a meeting with the hospital for me to get what I thought was closure on the entire experience.

My Gidget Clinician helped me work through the trauma by listening to me talk about it, which inherently allowed me to process it. However, this was not the only thing she helped me with.

I was adamant I was not going to have a second traumatic birth if I could help it. Therefore, I advocated for myself, and my Gidget Clinician helped me do this. It was through my advocation that I was able to have a positive birth, which has since allowed me to move on from my birth trauma and has put me in a much better mental space postpartum.

If I did not have this support from Gidget Foundation Australia,I am not sure how I would have gotten through my pregnancy and birth. Birth trauma is different for everyone, and I experienced firsthand how it can be overlooked by medical professionals. I highly recommend Gidget Foundation Australia.

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